Eat, Play, and Bring Love

Re-ignite Over the Summer

2010-07-06T11:00:00.000-07:00

When you first started dating, everyday felt like the 4th of July. You knew who (what) you were going to see, but every day (year) came with an inevitable surprise and an opportunity to just relax. Nowdays, relaxation might be a little harder to come by. Today, the last time you really relaxed might be physically fighting with the last time your husband surprised you with a new move in bed. You know, since the last one just had her second birthday party and the other one will be turning five. (Uh...your kids.)

The simple, yet not so simple, way to relax and share new experiences together would to just take a vacation. Like when people suggest that everyone should "just talk" to their partner about relationship problems, I say that it is easier said than done. Here are some suggestions to try at home (or close by) that could help bring you and your partner closer when you feel like you've grown distant:

Step Outside

The next time you want to tell your man to go take a hike, you might wanna change that phrase to, "Hey, let's go take a hike together." There's something about simply walking and talking that opens up both light conversation and mild discussion. When I dated my husband, we used to walk his nieces to the park to play and head out to the mountians on the spur of the moment. When nobody is watching, it's easier to say what's on your mind and you have the physical action of walking to keep your nerves at ease. As oppposed to a long car trip or packed airport, it really sets you up (with healthier space and time contraints) for more time bonding and less time to bicker. Wherever you choose to take a long walk to, I think that most people would agree that nature has a way of just relaxing things.

Party Together

No, not the babyshowers, not the three hour kid parties. We all have these parties to go to and it's fun to chat and see our children play games. In my experience, the "day-time" parties actually create tension half of the time. You're either late, not prepared or missing something. But, on to the brighter side:

Gather up music that you know puts you in a good mood and don't forget to throw in a few of his favorites. After all the day's basic events have passed, make a party for just the two of you. Fix up food and drinks more like a party and less like romantic dinner. I mean, we've already heard about the candles and lobster dinner plus whipped cream cliche. I'm not talking about that. I mean, set out the beer, hard cider or cheap sugary wines that you can down in three glasses.

Use a little nostalgic music and food to bring you back to when you couldn't wait to see him again. In this situation, even playing hard to get could be part of reviving the sense of seduction between you. Dance, just talk or both. Either way, you might just start liking him again. Well, we'll see...

Air and Water

2010-03-26T08:55:00.000-07:00

Call me crazy, but the real reason I had two boys is because I saw a man driving into the Angel Stadium parking lot with his two sons over a decade ago. I realized that, through it all, our life is about teaching and sharing as a family. Sure we work and we entertain ourselves, but the real way to connect is just to "be here" in our world, with our partners (and little partners).

Recently, I caught a glimpse of a man putting air into his tire at the gas station. His young son (maybe about five years old) was watching. I recall growing up and having my grandfather teach me basic car maintenance. Of course, the first was putting gas and keeping the handle level. Over a two decades later, I take pleasure in having my son try out the gas nozzle and teaching him the price of gas.

This reminds me that we really need to incorporate our children into our lives and really share what it is that we do day in and day out. Basic shopping and traveling could be full of little math and science lessons.

Have you found any great ways to teach your children by doing no more than simply explaining what you are doing?

The Rule of the Pitch Back

2010-03-19T11:10:00.000-07:00

Just recently I experienced two events that made me think of a piece of baseball equipment and what life has taught me so far. A Pitch Back is a standing net held together with what looks like big metal picture frame. The stand has angles bent into it so that if you throw a baseball at the center of the net it will firmly return to you. This is sort of a way to play catch with yourself and also practice aim when you throw. The Pitch Back is relevent in such a way that I have this beautiful Love/Hate, sort of Kind/Abrasive relationship with both my husband and my oldest son. (How conveniently, they have the same name.) Learning how to throw (pitch) something to them and how to react is really somewhat of a skill that I actually figured out from...the Pitch Back.

The basic rule of the Pitch Back is that you are going to pretty much recieve back what you put into it. This means that the harder you throw, the harder the ball return. The way you toss the ball to the net will undoubtedly influence the return and hence your reaction.

If you have ever had a Pitch Back, you might know how to throw yourself soft fly balls. You also might know that if you throw horribly at the net, the ball will return in a direction so akward that it is nearly impossible to catch.

The lesson to myself is, "Many times, you recieve what you put into it."

What kind of "lessons" did you learn as a child simply from practicing or playing a sport?

March Madness: Our 3 Basketball Games

2010-03-10T11:31:00.000-08:00

So we're getting into the swing of March with baseball players in spring training and getting ready to "Spring forward" our clocks. I can't wait for the time to change because I love to stay outside late playing sports. My oldest son's birthday just passed and we bought him a basketball court. Now we have essentially three basketball games: The Nerf basketball game in the family room, the basketball court out back and the basketball Wii game. My son and I like playing all of these. Eventhough basketball isn't my favorite sport, I appreciate the light cardio activity that it provides just from jumping and shooting hoops. (Yes, you do immensly better when you actually jump when you play Wii basketball.) I count my blessings, knowing that I am healthy enough to play with my children and I want to take advantage of the exercise it gives me.

What types of "play" with your children make you the happiest and keep you fit?
How important do you think it is to stay outside and play with your children, or is that what they have siblings for?

About Eat, Play, and Bring Love

2010-03-01T12:38:00.000-08:00

Everybody needs to eat and it’s safe to say that most people enjoy it. To play is to take your spirit and body into one and embrace it. Love is often embodied by a creative gesture and also plenty of hard work. We bring love when we simply spend time with the people we've been given to take care of. Our spirits are manifested into flesh and bone to do just that Eat, Play, and bring Love.

This blog is a simple reflection on some simple ways to find peace in your life by taking more time to combine life’s gifts.

What do you think is the most important aspect of being a Spouse or Parent? How could you spend more time with you family and enjoy those who you live with?